What’s in her name

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I’ve always liked names. Since high school (and probably even before that) I’ve been coming up with baby names for future children. Some people thought this was weird, but I know it’s not that unusual. These names have changed over time (and thankfully, as I’ve gone through some really horrible naming phases) but I’ve always had fun with them. When J and I met we found that we liked talking about names. From fairly early in our relationship (even before we knew we wanted to have kids together) we decided that for girls we liked the name Ava. Later on we added the name Olivia to that list. So when I became pregnant our girls names were obvious, Ava Elizabeth (which is my middle name) and Olivia Clare. We couldn’t agree on any boys names, but our girls names were settled.

Well, then I started doing some research and discovered that Ava and Olivia are each on the 2008 top Ten list of baby names. Hmmmm – guess we’re not so creative. Then we started seriously talking about names and realizing that now we didn’t agree on either boys names or girls names. So we started making lists of names that we liked and discovered some criteria.
1. We both liked classic names. OK, that’s something we can agree on. Nothing to trendy.
2. Neither of us wanted a name that is to popular.
However, we got into trouble with the syllables. J doesn’t like names that have more than two syllables. He thinks that a three syllable last name is long enough. I disagree and seem to especially like three syllable names. After much discussion and concessions from each of us, we ended up with a list of about six names for each gender that we both could agree on. For a while there it seemed like the only names on the list were names neither of us especially liked, but neither of us vetoed. We had to fix that – we didn’t want to someday tell our kid “Sorry we named you XX. Neither of us really like the name either, but it’s the name that we both hated the least. You got named by default.”
We decided not to talk to anyone about our name choices. I broke this rule a little bit, but in the end it worked out well. Honestly, when you talk about names people generally have a negative reaction. A person (myself included) is more likely to come up with what they don’t like about a name then what they do like about it. I don’t mean this to personally offend anyone, since I do it myself. In the end, since we had a hard enough time with each others opinions about names we decided that we didn’t really want to hear anyone else’s opinions either. (We’ve since met several couples who felt the same way we did. My favorite story is from our friends Steve and Leah who had a random woman in a restaurant get mad at them because they wouldn’t tell her the name they were thinking of.)
Finally we just decided to wait until we met the baby to decide on the name. This was a bit of a compromise, since J and I had decided on our favorite names of each gender and they weren’t the same name at all. I joked that yes, we each knew what we were naming the baby but unfortunately we were naming the one baby two different names.
When I saw our baby for the first time one of the first things I said was “Well, she’s not a Sylvia.” That was my top name. J took a few minutes longer and decided that no, she wasn’t a Charlotte either. We went down our list of other mutually agreeable names and weren’t quite sure. That night J went home to take a shower and I thought “what about Clare?” During this time he thought the same thing. It just seemed to fit. We both liked the name, but had always thought of it as a middle name. By the time we sent out our original birth announcement email we were pretty sure she was Clare, but we didn’t know the middle name and were hesitant to put it in print. By the next morning we had decided, she was Clare Elizabeth. As I’ve been writing this blog it occurred to me that we actually kept our original names we agreed on but threw out the to popular first names. Sigh – to think of all the disagreements that could have been avoided if we just figured that out sooner. Oh well.
Since she’s been born we’ve gotten all sorts of compliments about her name. Besides that, it fits. Our girl was always a Clare, we just didn’t know it yet.
Oh, and as for the spelling – it’s after County Clare in Ireland.
Family pic from the Bradley Class Reunion last weekend.
Yes, Clare looks like her Daddy.


Growing Up

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We weighed Clare yesterday and found out our girl is a whopping 8 pounds 9 ounces. I said to Jeremy “she’s packing on the poundage!” and he replied “well, at least the ounceage.” She’s still gaining over an ounce a day! I’m not exactly sure what I’m eating to make the kid grow so fast, but apparently it’s working. We haven’t measured her lately, but I suspect she’s added some length as well.

I have mixed feelings about it, because now our Clare has grown out of her newborn clothes. Grandma T mentioned that the blue watermelon onesie a few posts back looked a little snug. I’ve also noticed some of her clothes are getting a little short. So I went through the drawer today and pulled out all of her teensiest clothes and, with a little sigh, moved up her 3 month clothes. Don’t get me wrong, she has some cute stuff in there but it’s a little reminder the my tiny doll baby is no longer doll sized. Her 3 month stuff fits OK in length, but is a little wide. Oh well, I suspect she’ll fill those out soon enough.
Clare has marked the occasion by being especially fussy today. I think we’re fast approaching the 6-week fussiness peak. So most of our day has consisted of a lot of rocking and feeding. Oh well, I can think of worse things than cuddling with my sweet girl if that’s the only thing that makes her happy. Folding laundry and running errands can wait for another day.

Clare at 5 Weeks

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I’ve heard in passing that the first 4 weeks of parenthood are the hardest (or maybe the hardest of the first year). Now that I have the “wisdom” of that extra week, I think I understand what that means. The last week Clare started to become engaged and interested in us and the world around her. While the cuddles and closeness of those first newborn months are precious, the interactions she and I are now having are absolutely wonderful. I feel like we’re in the beginning stages of that 2-way relationship. Pretty much the only 2-way communication we had for the first month was her crying – I would talk to her, play with her, cuddle on her, etc. and she would cry back. My reward was when she was contented. It was great, but now getting smiles and eye contact is better. When I walk up to her bassinet and she smiles at me my heart melts. I think I’d used that term before, but I didn’t really understand what it meant. Now I do. Yesterday at the mall she was fussing in her stroller, but when I looked down and talked to her she focused on me and stopped fussing. Seriously – I can make my baby happy by stopping and talking to her! She likes me! I know it sounds a little silly to write, but in person it’s the best thing. Like I said, it’s the beginning of our parent-child relationship and it’s wonderful. I’m beginning to think this whole “going back to work” thing is going to be rough… I love seeing her everyday and watching her discover new things.

In other news, we had a reunion with our Bradley Birth class this last weekend. It was so fun to see the other couples and their sweet babies. We noticed that every single baby is especially cute – not a funny looking one in the bunch! It was also nice to be in a big group of new parents. If someone was nursing or if a baby was screaming, no one batted an eye. We chatted, shared birth stories, laughed and compared ‘no sleep moments’ over the din of babies. If someone got especially unhappy a Mommy or a Daddy would take him/her away for a few minutes, but for the most part we were able to carry on adult conversations and attend our little ones. It was also really nice to be in a group of people going through the exact same experience we are. I’m already planning a Mommy Martini night for the Mom’s.
Here are a couple of pictures of the babies at the reunion. Several of them (including Clare) were fussing when we put them down on the blanket so we weren’t sure if we would be able to get any pictures. When we put them down every single one stopped crying and we had a good 5 minutes with 7 happy babies. It seemed like a miracle. Of course their view looking up was of 14 parents standing over them cooing and ga-gaing over the cuteness. It may have distracted the cryers.
The back row is all of the boys ( from left: Grayson, Jake, Teo and Peter) while the front row is the girls (Libby, Clare, and Attilie). The four boys were born first and the three girls were born last. Our little Clare is the second youngest and the lightest.
Close up on Clare. She’s ‘straightjacketed’ because she was fussing and J wanted to show off a swaddle technique he uses when it’s to warm for a full swaddle.
Here is a picture of Clare smiling at me from the swing this morning. She loves her swing and just discovered the mirror and mobile on it. It also plays a little song that she likes (she’s just discovered music in the last week). I love the swing because I can put her in it and she’s happy during the time it takes me to grab a shower. She also falls asleep in it sometimes. I try not to ‘overuse’ it, but it’s a handy tool to have.

Smiles

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So I finally have a couple of pictures of Clare’s smile. Neither of these pictures are her full out beam – but they are little half smiles. Either way they make my day whenever I get them. She’s particularly partial to her Daddy, so he gets most of the smiles. Hmmmm – maybe I should give him the camera so he can try to get more pictures of her.

Finally, here’s a picture of her favorite sleeping position – with one arm in the air. At night we swaddle her so she can’t do this, but during the day she usually has at least one arm up.

Happy 1 Month Birthday!

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It’s hard to believe, but this Friday our Clare will be one month old! The first two weeks seemed long, but the last two weeks disappeared in the blink of an eye. On one hand it seems like we were just in the hospital having her, but on the other hand I can’t really remember life without her. J describes it best by saying “I don’t remember a time when I didn’t love her.” Parent love is a crazy thing – it’s the most instant, deepest, natural love in the world. I can only compare it to falling in love with a spouse or partner, except that there’s no heady infatuation phase. It’s just BOOM you see your baby and it’s immediately “I love you more than my own life.” Unlike falling in love with a person, it doesn’t matter who your baby is or what they are like – you instantly love them and think they’re perfect. It’s a good thing too – since these little buggers can certainly test you.
Fortunately for us, Clare is a fairly easy testing baby. Oh she has her moments, but compared to some stories I’ve heard from other parents of newborns, our girl is easy. She likes to sleep and eat and generally doesn’t just cry for no reason (though now that I’ve written that I’m sure she’ll scream tonight just ’cause). Sure she has her fussy moments, but we’re getting better about recognizing them and dealing with them. I’ve noticed that after a meal we get 20-30 minutes of sweet, happy, alert and smily Clare. Then she’ll yawn once or twice and turn into fussy, tired Clare. So we just shush and cuddle her until she falls asleep. Roughly 2 hours later the whole cycle repeats itself. She likes to take longer naps in the morning and early afternoon, and is more awake (and sometimes fussier) in the late afternoon and evenings. She loves to eat and will really lose her cool if she’s hungry (hmmmm, she may take after me in this regard). The really cool thing is that she’s starting to recognize J and I a little bit more. We’re starting to get smiles we think just might be in response to us (not just in response to having a full tummy) and she’s watching us more and making more direct eye contact. This is particularly evident when we’re changing her diaper – she watches us the whole time. It’s as if she’s now realized we’re not just a part of the background like the chair upholstery or wall paint, that we’re a reoccurring cast of characters in her life and she thinks she might like us (some of the time). She’s always been a cuddle bug, but she’s started to snuggle in more and even protest when she’s not cuddling (like a particularly long night when she would only sleep tucked in next to me and not in her bed – aka our first venture into co-sleeping).
She continues to grow and while her newborn clothes still fit her skinny little body, she’s beginning to outgrow them in length. We measured her the other day and she’s now 22 inches long, up from 20 (or 19.5 depending on who did the measuring) when she was born. I’m guessing she’s still gaining about an ounce a day (maybe less) so she’s probably coming up on 8 pounds. Sigh, my little doll baby is growing up.

Clare in her crib

Mama with Clare in the sling

Clare at 3 Weeks

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It’s hard to believe, but our Clare has now been on ‘the outside’ for 3 weeks now. The first two weeks seemed like an eternity (mostly in a good way) but the last week has flown by. I think it’s partly because we’re getting into a little more of the routine of this parenting thing and because it was a very busy week. Jeremy’s mom Teresa (Grandma T) and Aunt Donna (who we’ve named Auntie Donna the Great, since it’s more fitting than Great Aunt Donna), and my brother and sister-in-law, Uncle JP and Auntie Debbie, all came to visit over the week and weekend. Teresa got in first and Clare and I met her at the airport. Clare decided to greet her grandmother for the first time by throwing a royal fit over being hungry. Fortunately, we found a nice chair in a private spot and Clare and I had our first airport nursing experience. Welcome to PDX Grandma T!
We had a wonderful visit with Teresa and Donna, who both just loved our little girl. With them in town, not to mention JP and Debbie, little Clare wasn’t out of someone’s arms until Saturday night. It was pretty sweet.
Clare is growing like a little weed. Yesterday she weighed in at 7 lbs 4 ozs at the pediatricians. This is an average of an ounce a day weight gain from the week before. It makes sense to me, since the kid wants to eat what seems like all the time. The pediatrician was thrilled with her weight gain and J and I are relieved to know that we seem to be doing something right. We were a little bit concerned because she’s started sleeping for really long periods at night (sometimes up to 7 hours!). I felt bad being worried about this (not that I was complaining, but I was a little worried) but the pediatrician assured us that as long as she keeps gaining weight then she can sleep for as long as she wants. For any Mom’s out there who are reading this and giving the blog the stink eye over an newborn who sleeps for 7 hours at a stretch at night, rest assure that Clare acted like a normal newborn the last two nights and woke up every 3 hours to eat. Sigh – it was nice while it lasted. We’ll see what tonight brings.

Oh! I almost forgot the biggest news of the week. Clare has started smiling! I don’t have a picture of it yet, but trust me, it’s a sight to behold. It usually happens after a big meal and the first few smiles seemed to be in relation to having a full tummy, not necessarily in response to what she was looking at (except the first smile, which happened when she was looking at Grandma T – I’m sure that was all about Grandma!). However, the last couple of days she’s started to smile specifically at people and last night I got my first smile directed at me. It was magic. I hope to get a picture soon to share.

Clare at 2 Weeks

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Happy Birthday Clare!
It’s Clare’s 2 week birthday today. She’s had a big couple of days lately – though she may not be aware of it. A few days ago she received her first piece of mail, her social security card came in the mail. So she is now an official, legal citizen. Today she went to the orthopedic pediatrician (more on that later) and we found out that she now weighs 6 lbs. 14 oz. This is a big deal since she has exceeded her birth weight by 4 ounces in 2 weeks (which is what our pediatrician wanted). I’m thrilled that she’s eating so well and is so healthy. We must be doing something right.
We went to the orthopedic pediatrician today because of a concern we had about Clare’s right foot when she was born. It is turned in slightly like a club foot, but unlike a club foot the bones aren’t fused inward and her foot can be moved back to a normal position. The pediatricians who examined her in the hospital after she was born recommended that we have an orthopedist look at it ‘just to be sure.’ The orthopedist proclaimed it a ‘perfectly healthy foot’ and said it should straighten out on its own over time. We weren’t really concerned about it, but I feel better now knowing we don’t have to watch it in the future.
Besides these things, the other bit of excitement in our house is that Clare has had five-hour stints of sleeping over the last two nights. This is mostly exciting for me, but I think Clare likes it too. We seem to be over last week’s fussiness and she’s been very sweet, alert and interested in the world around her these last few days. We think her eye sight is beginning to improve and she’s focusing on things that are farther away. She also let out a little coo the other day – which was absolutely adorable. In general she’s become more verbal. It’s most little grunts and sighs, but she makes quite a bit of noise for someone so small. It’s so fun watching these tiny little incremental development changes and she seems to change a little bit every day. I just keep my fingers crossed that the changes keep moving in the direction of sleeping more and crying less.
Below are some pictures of Clare ‘talking’ to Jeremy and I.


I especially love the picture of her and Jeremy because you can see her little hands in the air. She’s very expressive and her little hands and arms especially are always moving around, even in her sleep. I’ll try to get a picture in the next few days of her sleeping with her arms over her head.

1 Week + 2 Days

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We’ve now been home from the hospital for four days. I’ve heard a lot of people say that the first days home are the hardest, and on Sunday I was thinking “this isn’t so bad. We just have the perfect baby, so we won’t have hard days.” Ha! That’s what I get for being over-confident. Clare started alternating fussing and screaming on Sunday night and pretty much didn’t stop until Tuesday. The sleep deprivation, demands of nursing, recovery from the C-section (and maybe some postpartum hormones) caught up with me, in addition to Jeremy starting working and being home less, and created a bit of a perfect storm. Fortunately, Mom and Jeremy to the rescue and an afternoon spent with my mom (who came bearing grocery bags of good food) and a good night’s sleep (courtesy of J who took all of the night feedings last night) has made all the difference. I woke up this morning, looked at Clare’s tiny little face and said “I missed you last night.”
Besides our first challenging days, we’ve had fun visiting with people and introducing them to Clare.

Uncle Jon and Cousin Eric met her on Sunday. Eric wasn’t sure about holding her, but he did a good job.


Jeremy showed off his patented Baby Soothing Technique
Talking to Baby Clare
On Tuesday we went to visit our friends David and Jennilyn. They were due with their second baby on July 4 (the day before us) and we both went over a week late. Our babies were born on the same day, an hour and a half apart. Jenn and I were pregnancy buddies and would commiserate in late pregnancy. David is a wonderful photographer and took our maternity pictures. He also took some shots of us while we were there. Here is an impromptu pic of Jenn and I at our ‘nursing bar.’
Clare and Violet. We were joking that Violet looked like a Zen Buddha baby – while Clare (who was squawking and wiggling) was not very Zen.
Jenn and I with our babies.
Cross-eyed Baby. This picture cracks me up!
Proud Mama!
She has Jeremy’s eyebrows and expressions.
J lovin’ on Clare.

Back Home

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Clare made her first big trip yesterday – home from the hospital! We bundled her up in a little sleeper (to big of course), put her in the car seat, and drove the 5 minutes home. She liked being outside and promptly fell asleep in the car (yes!). My parents (the invaluable Grandma and Grampa Dion) came with us, helped us carry the gear, went out and got us lunch, and got us settled in. J and I took a nice nap while the grandparents watched Clare, and then we made dinner that they brought over. I told J when they left (to go home and let our dog out – since Sadie’s been staying with them this last week) that we are much better parents because my parents take such good care of us. Seriously, how do people do this without full time grandparents? I’m not sure we could do it without them.
Our first night at home went surprisingly well, though I feel like I’m tempting fate even saying that out loud. The nurses at the hospital told us to feed her every 2 – 3 hours, but she usually sleeps right through that so we’ve been setting the alarm every 2.5 hours to wake us up so we can wake her up. I’m hoping that after our pediatrician appointment on Monday they will tell us she’s gaining enough weight that we can switch to feeding on her schedule (e.i. she will wake us up when she’s hungry, not us having to wake her up). Every precious moment of sleep is worth it these days. I figure if she wants to go 4 to 5 hours between feedings then I’m OK with that – especially if it’s after midnight 🙂
Finally – some pictures of the last few days. She’s getting prettier by the minute and is still so, so sweet. We’re feeling like we’re getting a bit of a handle on this new family thing, so we’re open to having visitors. If you want to meet our little joy, give us a call or stop on by. I’ll warn you now though, be prepared to give up your heart. She’s a little heart stealer!
Proud Grandma!

In her going home outfit.

In the car seat ready to go!
Tummy time on the gliding foot stool.
Sweet picture of Clare’s biggest admirer.
Daddy’s thumb is bigger than Clare’s foot.

Clare – Days 2 and 3

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Clare is 3 days old now and getting more wonderful each day. She’s quite the cuddle bug and just wants to be loved and held – which works out well since that’s all we want to do to her 🙂
We’re going home and back to real life tomorrow. We had the option of being discharged today, and probably would’ve been fine, but decided to stay one more night to take advantage of the breastfeeding support (not to mention the laundry, meal and cleaning services 🙂 The hospital isn’t exactly a resort property, but it’s been fairly comfortable and the staff has been very nice. The help we’ve received has been so valuable and we both are pretty sure we knew nothing about babies before this week since we’ve learned so much so quickly.
Here are some pictures from the last two days.

One tired, but happy Mama.
My little Miss Bright Eyes. She had about 45 minutes this afternoon where she was just awake, alert and staring at both Dad (Grandpa) and I. She is a little genius, we’re both pretty sure.
Chattin’ with Grandpa
Sleeping in the bassinet – she loves to be swaddled tightly.
She gets pretty cranky when we unwrap her, but this picture shows her long, skinny arms and legs.
Looking at me – not sure if she liked what she saw…
We can’t hardly keep our eyes off of her.
Calm and alert baby.
“Whatcha doin’ there?”
Looking at DaddyProud Grandpa!
Sweet, sleeping baby